Previously I posted a parody about my experiences on the tube...this time I'm not posting any parodies, or jokements. This is a real account of the nonsense that happened to me this afternoon on the Elephant & Castle to Willesden Junction on the Bakerloo Line.
The journey started with me missing the Harrow & Wealdstone tube, and due to missing it, I ended up sitting opposite the weirdest little man with a questionable stain on his pants, who stared at me with unmoving eyes and a perverted smile until he got off at Kilburn Park. I spent the ride avoiding his eyes, all because I was too lazy and too comfortable in my corner chair. I looked above his head...to the left of him...to the right...and when my eyes accidently dropped down and connected with his he winked and licked his cracked lips.
I diverted my attention to a more desirable sight - the lady with the toenails which were clinging for dear-life over the edge of her sandals. She had the cheek to paint them bronze.
Then, because TFL are bastards, the train terminated at Queens Park and I endured a few minutes of casual racism from an old Jewish woman who decided to be-friend me when I stopped her from getting on the wrong train. Some of the highlights:
"It's so hot today isn't it?"
"Yeah it is quite warm."
"I can't handle the heat anymore. But you can, because you come from a hot country originally don't you?"
*I blink.* "Umm, yes, my grandparents do."
"What country is that then? It's a Caribbean one isn't it?"
"Yes...Jamaica."
"Oh. I've been to lots of the Caribbean islands but not that one because it always has problems doesn't it?" *I blink twice.* She continues - "Yes I've been to most of them, even that one which had the earthquake or wind or whatever happened to it [she was referring Montserrat by the way] So do you go back to where you came from often?"
And this was a particularly tame day...SMH need-a-car-much?
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